“I want to it ooooon”
^^^ one of my daughters screams…determined to wear a dress, soaking wet in the washing machine soaking…
Now I could go into stress mode..
“We are running late”
“We need to go”
“Just put this on”
But 1 thing I find which always works better
Is to remember that people ignore patterns…
Sounds odd..
But If I do something quite random, like any of the following (and there many more):
- Pretend to be a statue rather than shouting back “come on, we need to go”
- Pretend to put on one of her other dresses saying “why does this not fit me, pretending to cry”
- Crawl around the living room in a bear crawl position pretending to be a train, putting on the voice of the London Underground “The next station is ‘putting on a dress’, calling at a smelly sock on the floor from yesterday and ‘putting on a dress’…(they then like to get on my back, like I am a train. So random but so fun
Anyway, by doing this?
It changes their state.
A state now which I can help them reason and almost laugh at what they did …
Showing how quickly they can go from crying and moaning
To laughing…
Now, this does not work every time…
Sometimes it is me to blame,
I sometimes do not have the patience to be a train haha
But..
They say kids are your biggest teachers..
And one thing I have learnt through 5 years of
Intense negotiations with a 5 and 4 year old
about everything from what to wear
To
getting out of the house, sharing, homework, wearing a coat when it is -4 degrees outside (ok, maybe my fault given I spend most of the year in shorts)…
I could go on..
Is that it reiterated I was aware of when studying the behaviour change side of things at Loughborough University and Oxford Brookes in Nutrition
Which is that people IGNORE PATTERNS..
And this is why it is so difficult to change your habits and behaviour.
Despite trying and with good intentions
Maybe you end up doing the same ‘bad’ habit you want to give up.
I get it.
So what can you do?
Well, we can start to create an environment that makes it easier to make better choices
Like keeping the toaster away in a cupboard
Like only having a fruit bowl out in the kitchen on the side and snacks and cereal away in the cupboard.
Like having a nice non-alcoholic drink available if your aim is to not drink that night..
I could go on.
Your environment plays a massive impact in what you do.
With some research saying that those with just a fruit bowl out in the kitchen
Are on average 10lbs lighter than those with cereal and snacks out..
Small habits, compound effect.
And speaking of small habits, compound effect.
I will be sharing small, simple habits in my FREE 5-Day Kickstart
Beginning on Monday 9th January 2023..
Specifically for women 40+ who pretty much know what to do but need the plan and accountability to do it and kickstart 2023 differently.
Details here:
Click here: https://frucifit.com/wiltshire-challenge/
This is completely free.
All I ask is that you meet me half way 🙂
Matt